When Sober Curious Strikes Past Dry January

Firstly of 2025, the previous US Surgeon Normal issued an advisory on the hyperlink between alcohol consumption and cancer risk. Whereas it is a sobering name to motion, there isn’t any denying that sober curiosity has elevated lately. From Dry January to extra manufacturers creating alcohol-free drinks to the rise of mainstream mocktails, now greater than ever even informal drinkers have gotten sober curious and analyzing their relationship with alcohol.

Final 12 months in Episode 146 of the FBG Podcast, Sobriety Coach, and Founding father of Sober Wild, Krysty Krywko, Ed.D, joined our EIC Alison for an interview on sobriety. As we speak we’re persevering with this dialog with Krysty. Dry January has handed however definitely not the questions on what we are able to do if we’re desirous about a sober (fully alcohol free), or damp (a discount in alcohol consumption), life. 

Tam: Ought to we strategy ingesting as all or nothing, particularly if we’re sober curious?

Krysty: I feel it’s a really private resolution, however should you’re any form of an everyday drinker (that means three or 4 nights per week “simply to unwind”) then alcohol is impacting the way in which you’re feeling – mentally, emotionally, and bodily – your physique simply doesn’t know there’s one other method. In the event you’re not ingesting in the course of the week, however then ingesting a few bottles of wine over the weekend, you by no means actually get the possibility to see how your physique and thoughts reacts to no alcohol. Anna Lembke, in her guide, Dopamine Nation: Finding Balance in the Age of Indulgence, talks about how “abstaining from our drug of alternative for not less than 4 weeks offers clarifying behaviors. Perception that merely just isn’t potential whereas we proceed to make use of.” In different phrases, you haven’t any thought how shitty you actually really feel once you’re utilizing a substance that’s making you’re feeling shitty. It often takes just a few weeks on your physique to regulate to the truth that you’re now not consuming a poisonous substance.

Tam: Are there concerns/greatest practices to go from Dry January to extra of a Damp February and past? 

Krysty: So, I don’t actually know the reply to that query, it actually is dependent upon what your motivation was for Dry January. Was the plan to simply see should you may make it with out ingesting for 30 days? Or had been you searching for actual well being advantages? Or did you understand that your ingesting has elevated over the previous few years and you already know you wanted to take a break?

Moderation, which is de facto what Damp February is all about, doesn’t work for lots of people. In the event you spend numerous time bargaining with your self at any time when alcohol is concerned, which results in numerous “guidelines” round your ingesting, you may need to take a step again.

You won’t even concentrate on these guidelines. They’ve simply turn into a part of your interior chatter. That chatter may sound like this:
I’m not going to drink on my own.
No ingesting earlier than 5:00 p.m.
No exhausting alcohol in the course of the week
I’m solely going to drink white wine (or beer, or vodka, and so forth.)
I can’t have greater than two drinks on per week night time.
I can’t drink greater than two nights in a row. 

The top days of my ingesting had been full of elaborate and arcane guidelines that had been continually shifting as I broke one after one other. I used to be letting myself down day by day, and that form of self-disappointment was like a relentless stream of micro-cuts to my soul.

Take a second and take into consideration why you’re placing so many guidelines round your ingesting. You may simply resolve that it’s now not price it.

Tam: If somebody is studying this pondering “I do not need an issue with my alcohol consumption however need to take a extra conscious strategy to what I eat/drink,” what questions must be explored when desirous about alcohol consumption? 

Krysty: One of many first issues we have to do is transfer away from the language round ingesting and the idea that there are “downside drinkers” after which everybody else. This results in disgrace, stigma, and judgement.

A way more helpful, and life like, mannequin to make use of in terms of speaking about alcohol is the thought of ingesting occurring on a spectrum. That’s the place the thought of “grey space drinker” emerged from, which encompasses everybody from the every-now-and-then drinker to those that are bodily hooked on alcohol. The great thing about this mannequin is that you simply don’t must hit any type of a all-time low earlier than you possibly can discover your relationship with alcohol, you get to resolve at any level on the spectrum what’s best for you.

In the event you’re able to get sincere with the function alcohol performs in your life, I might counsel sitting down with a pen and paper and answering the next questions. Get interested in your self, and take the time to reply truthfully. Don’t cloud your responses with disgrace, or judgement, or what your bestie goes to suppose. That is about you and the one life that you’ve, and whether or not or not you desire a poisonous substance to play a job within the creation of that life. 

Is alcohol nonetheless working for me?
How is alcohol making me really feel?
What areas of my life has alcohol taken over?
Does ingesting align with the particular person I’m now?
What would “future you” inform “current you” on this scenario?

Tam: What if our associates have gone again to ingesting after Dry January, however we try to proceed. Do you might have recommendations/suggestions for tips on how to make this a part of my life-style with my ingesting associates? 

Krysty: You may want to search out new associates – haha. However, critically, if your pals actually respect and help you within the choices you make in your life, then it shouldn’t be an issue. However, in the event that they’re frequently attempting to push you to start out ingesting once more, whining that you simply’re not enjoyable anymore, or that one shot of tequila gained’t do any hurt, then you definately may must rethink who you’re spending time with. You should work out for your self what you need to do with the time that you’ve, and the individuals you spend it with. 

Moreover, in case your pal group is closely immersed in ingesting tradition – that means most social actions revolve round alcohol – then you definately may want to search out some new peeps that love to do various things.

Tam: Any favourite “drink” hacks to interchange that Friday night time cocktail? 

Krysty: I’m essentially the most primary sober particular person round – and I’m proud of ingesting a seltzer on my sofa to unwind after a busy week. However, I do know that folks have totally different wants, and I get that within the early days of going alcohol-free you may want one thing a bit extra thrilling. Fortunately, the alcohol-free market is on hearth! There are such a lot of merchandise available on the market – suppose flavored seltzers, glowing teas, alcohol-free beers, wines, and spirits, kombuchas – I actually may go on and on. I’m frequently impressed on the locations the place I discover alcohol-free drinks – Goal, Dealer Joe’s, Entire Meals, common grocery shops, and native alcohol-free bottle outlets are beginning to provide such all kinds. My solely warning is be intentional when utilizing alcohol-free merchandise, particularly issues like alcohol-free wine or beer. In the event you’re downing a bottle of alcohol-free wine most nights of the week, it’s form of like ripping off one bandage and placing on one other, and also you may need to discover why you’re caught in the identical behaviors. 

Did you do Dry January this 12 months and preserve a dry or damp February? What’s your sober curious hack? ~ Tam